Ready, Set, Don't Go.

I'm afraid of the future. I'm afraid I'll be alone. I'm afraid of losing a parent, a friend, a co-worker, anyone. I'm afraid of being unemployed, of meeting Mr. Wrong. I'm afraid I won't be successful, I'm afraid of being a mother. I'm afraid of leaving my parents. I'm afraid of the goodbyes, I'm afraid of the possiblity of enduring even more heartbreak.

I'm afraid of...me. I'm afraid of having weak moments. I'm afraid of doing exactly what I want. I'm afraid of finding myself.

I can't deny it anymore. I'm weak. I've been listening to "I Can't Make You Love Me" over and over. I was doing so well. I approached the situation as an adult, and I got adult responses. But then why, does my heart strain? Why is it, that I'm going back to those pictures, looking back at the memories.

I thought my heart had finally fully healed. I realized, that it hasn't. All the guys I took interest in, I never was ME with them. I wanted something to work so bad. But I need to be patient, take a step back.

"Cause there's always gonna be another mountain. I'm always gonna wanna make it move."

And I need to focus on the climb. There's a reason for everything in life, and I just need to slow down, and wait for it.