Learn to Fly

Good Morning everyone!!! So, it's been a pretty rough week so far. I know, sometimes I'm sure you just wanna smack me for the amount of complaining I do, but seriously, FML!

My friends are starting to make me feel more && more shitty. Not J.Wilt or the ex..just the one's in a relationship. Monday was Kerri's boyfriends birthday and currently he doesn't have a car because it's broken. And Kerri doesn't even have a driver's license. So, she of course texted me..saying she was sooo bored, and how her bf's parents wouldn't even take him out to dinner..bascially trying to get me to say that I'd pick him up for her. So, I just told her I had plans..((which was true)) but ya know thanks for making me feel shitty!

Then, I'm supposed to go to PA this weekend. Well, I thought about it, and I was like okay, I'll go. Well, last night Pa Lova texted me and told me she was leaving tomorrow for PA and I was like that's cool, no biggie. She's spending Friday with her mom and honestly I was considering backing out anyways. Well, last night at the get together she told me I should take Friday off, so that I could come with her. I polietely declined citing the fact that I would no longer be working Wednesdays. But, bascially she just wanted me to come so that she wouldn't have to drive alone! Like thanks, bring with you, so you can spend all of Friday with your mom and all of Saturday with your friends...it's not like I'd have a car either!

And on top of it, I was feeling uber shitty because I was sitting next to J.Dubs last night, PA Lova was on her other side and J.Dubs always only turned to PA Lova to talk..and when PA Lova was ready to leave she turned to me and I must've had my FML look on, and she was like, "What's wrong?" I just shrugged and said goodbye. Now, I don't know about you guys, but everytime you're friend looks upset wouldn't you ask what's wrong if they didn't wanna talk about it afterwards? I know you all would!!!!! But instead I got nothing till 1115 when she had to tell me that this girl that she doesn't like showed up at the gym after her and J.Dubs left.

I'm just soo tiredd of being treated like crap by my friends who are in relationships!! PA Lova is becoming the biggest user I've ever met and I'm really about to cut ties with her. Her and Lil B only invited me to come with to N.E. Dustoff for the weekend so that she wasn't left alone!!! And whenever she's mad or upset I'm always there for her because of the simple fact, that when I was 16, I did the same thing to my friends, and they told me that I'd be friendless if I continued that, so from then on, I made sure at all times that I made time for them..legit we can talk about whatever time.

But now all I do is get shit on and used. And it hurts so bad, I almost started crying this morning. Swan and I are having a birthday party celebration on Wednesday and he wanted to change it to this weekend sometime and I told him we couldn't because I wanted PA Lova there. But, now I really don't give a rats ass. I need to find friends who will respect me and not use me to vent about how stupid their bf is being, or about how they need this or that, but can't even give me the time of day when I need it.

Ok, ok..I digress. I have happier news...

Mr. Coco showed up to the get together last night!!! When I was dropping the ex and his pup off ((we brought his doggie to the dog park!)), I receieved a text from Coco, asking where the gtg was. And when I was on my way, PA Lova texted and said, "you're boy Coco is here!" I beamed like no other.

Got there and just had a normal convo, I was gauging how he was going to be..because ya know of what the ex said yesterday. He was uber chill though, we talked about how he hates his boss and other such interesting stuff. We talked about our plans for tomorrow, he said he needed to keep it low-key because he had a dyno run to do around 4, so he probably wouldn't be home till 8..((he works at ECS Performance, they 'pimp' out your ride bascially)). So, we might grab a drink or watch a movie or something. =) I really think things are looking up with him. =)

Plus, I just asked him if he'd come out for me and Swan's birthday..and he said he'd def. be there. =) ((hopefully for me and not the bbq place we're going too..lol))

So, I'm half happy, half sad..but still ALL ME!