Summer!?! Okay, You Were Here For A Day!?

Yesterday actually felt like summer to me. I went swimming for the first time this year! =) I got up around 1000am ((i know im lazy on my days off)) and headed on over to the home where CM nannies. The mother was gone, off to a trip to Boston for business, so she had the house to herself. ((The mom wouldnt care anyway, lol)).

CM takes care of a 2 yr old girl and 8 mnth twin boys. Yesterday, she only had the boys, so while they were napping we went for a swim. OMG, it was sooo nice. I haven't been swimming since last year in Florida.

After that, we woke them up, went for a walk, and then fed them. Then I left and went and chilled with Swan and LB. Then it was home for dinner and then off to CM's. We needed to finish up some shopping for her apt.

Yup, its true. She's moving on out! At first, it wasn't going to be till August, but they found a nice two family split level apt for a decent price. Her move out date is July 11th. I only drove by it the other nite, but it looks nice from the outside. It's right near the main drag here in town too! I'm sooo excited for her, but at the same time obvii a tad jealous and sad. ((but i'll get to that in a minute.))

So, we ended up going to Bed, Bath && Beyond last nite. We were in there for a good hour, but she found a bunch of stuff she needed for her kitchen at good prices. She got mixing bowls, cookie sheets, a wastebasket for the bathroom, and some other things. In her room everything she's bought so far is nicely organized in one pile. It feels like christmas in there! She's only missing a couple of things for her kitchen, and the only thing she really has to do before she moves in is paint the kitchen. And then, she's moving in with her bf.

And honestly, I'm a bit sad, and jealous. I'm jealous because I want to live with LB. I've been with him for 4 yrs practically ((if you don't count those 5 mnths with that dbag)). We are more than ready mentally to move in with one another, but we are broke as shit. And that's what makes me sad. Watching CM buy all these things, and tell me over and over how much she can't wait to have me over all the time, makes me uber sad.

Don't get me wrong, I don't mind living at home. But I want to live with LB. I'm tired of going to his house, only to have to leave every night and go back to my own. And his mom isn't the happiest when I sleep over. I want to wake up next to LB every morning. I want to cook dinner and clean. I want to play xbox and hang out with him in our room, but at the same time be able to walk into the living room when I don't want to be confinded to one room. ((which is what I feel like now..his mom bascially pushes us into his room)). I want to be able to have our friends over, and not have his mom biitch because she wants her "alone" time.

I want to own my own dog and not hear his mom grumble when her dog whines because he rather be in the room with us, because we actually do things with him. (( like take him to doggy daycare, pick him up, take him to the dog park, cuddle with him, and feed him, take him out to pee/poop)) All she does is walk him occasionally, and feed him her leftovers. ((like helllooooo thats bad for him!!))

At the same time, I'm just tired of being effin poor. I'm tired of wanting to do things, and not be able to do it because of low funds. I want to stop spending my money when I really shouldn't so that I can do stuff. I just want more money to be able to do stuff!! and be able to save to move out.

LB keeps saying we have a while. Helloo, hunnni, you're 25, I'm 23. We don't have that long. I wanna live with LB for like a year and then get married. Then take 2-3 yrs to just be newleyweds and then have kiddies. I don't wanna feel rushed into starting a family. Which is his whole thing. He'd be ok with gettin married in like 3 yrs and then starting a family 6 mnths later.

I don't wanna be 30 when I have kids. I wanna be 26-27. Which is still 30 to me. ((lol))
Ok, anyways sorry for the rant. lol.